Golfing on Father's Day

This is a story from my childhood as told to me by my father:

One year for Father's Day my dad wanted to go out and hit a bucket of balls.  He wanted to try to get me interested in the sport, so he brought me along and left my baby brother at home with my mother.  Since it was Father's Day, the place was full and there weren't many spots open, but we managed to find one.  I sat on the nearby bench and watched while my father happily set up his golf ball on the tee.

I'm not sure how much any of you know about golf.  I, frankly, know basically nothing about the game. This is something that hasn't changed since I was very small.

My father squinted down the fairway and set his feet. He looked down his club and took a slow practice swing.  As soon as he finished with his follow-through, he heard me call out from the bench, "You missed it, Dad!" The father next to him snickered.

My father kindly took the next few seconds to explain that before you actually swing at the ball, you practice your swing to make sure you're doing what you want to be doing.  My small self nodded sagely while my father stepped up to the green and took another practice swing.

"Missed it again, Dad!"

This time more than one nearby father attempted to hide their laughter while my father politely explained what was happening once again.  Unfortunately, children don't really know the difference between an "inside" voice and an "outside" voice, nor do they typically understand why it might be unwise to simply blurt out everything they think so that an entire golfing range might hear them.

"Oh! I get it.  Every time you miss the ball it's called a practice swing!"

By now, none of the dads could keep it together any more and they started guffawing so loud that my dad couldn't help but look around and shake his head. Thankfully, he didn't feel the need for any more practice swings, so he stepped right up to the tee and took his swing--only to have the ball go right into the grass about three feet in front of him.

Yup. Sometimes it just doesn't pay to take your daughter to the golfing range.