Lessons from my Mother

In honor of Mother's Day, I have decided to make a list of things that my mother has taught me:

1. "Nothing is ever as bad as you think it's going to be (unless you are traveling alone with two crying children, in which case it will be worse. Much, much worse)."

2. "I know that person just made you angry, but they might be trying to get to a family member at the hospital or might be distracted because their cat/dog died. Give them the benefit of the doubt."

3. My mother was not put on this planet to make my life miserable.  Even if I don't understand the reasons behind why she did something, I can trust that she always had my best interests at heart (took me 16 years to learn this one!)

4. Sometimes a strategically placed rude comment to the right audience can totally break the ice.

5. Learning music is really good for the soul, even though you often want to throw your trumpet across the room or run it over with a semi truck.

6. "You will thank me for this later" is annoying to hear, but totally true.

7. There is no problem so big that it cannot be remedied by eating pie.

8. Mom knows everything. EVERYTHING. Don't event think about trying to keep anything secret from her. She. Will. Know.

9. The ability to make fun of yourself is a necessary life skill.

10. "Remember: it could always be worse. At least you don't have cancer." Translation: stop whining and go do something proactive.

11. Life is scary, but you can handle it.

12. There is nothing quite as amazing as a phone call with my mother after I've done something stupid.

13. Mom hugs are the best. (So are dad hugs.)

14. Growing up and becoming more like your parents really isn't as horrible as your high school self thought it would be.

15. No matter how bad you screw up, Mom will have a snarky comment to make and somehow it always helps you feel less terrible.

More Online Dating Shenanigans

I reactivated my online dating profile so that I could rate two of my friends as five stars. Within 48 hours, I had received 35 messages and 99 profile views.  These are some of the highlights:

Today's winner (name has been removed because....I'm not sure why, but I felt like I should):